What Is a Memorial Garden?
A memorial garden is generally described as a dedicated outdoor space created to honor and remember a person (or sometimes a pet) who has passed away. It can be as modest as a single planter or raised bed, or as involved as a larger, evolving garden space — there’s no fixed size or format that makes something a memorial garden. What tends to matter most is the intention behind it: a space set aside for reflection, remembrance, and a living connection to someone’s memory.
For many people, tending a memorial garden over time can also be a genuinely comforting, grounding activity during grief, offering a sense of continued care and connection.
Choosing a Location
Choosing where to place a memorial garden is generally a personal decision, guided by what location feels meaningful to you and the people involved. Common options include a corner of a home garden, a community or shared green space, or near a gravesite, where permitted.
A few practical considerations worth thinking through:
- Sunlight. Most flowering plants generally need at least six hours of direct sun per day, unless you’re specifically planning a shade garden — our guide to the best flowers for shade covers options if your chosen spot is more shaded.
- Accessibility. If you intend to visit and tend the space regularly, it helps to choose a spot that’s reasonably easy to reach and maintain over time.
- Permissions. If you’re considering a public space, a shared community area, or a cemetery plot, it’s worth checking what’s allowed before planting.
Involving Family and Friends
Creating a memorial garden can be a deeply personal project, but many families find it meaningful to involve others in the process. A few general ways this is sometimes done:
- Inviting each family member or friend to plant a tree, shrub, or flower as their own personal contribution to the space.
- Holding a small dedication gathering once the garden is established, where people can share a memory or add a personal note.
- For those who can’t visit in person, sharing photos of the garden’s progress over time, or inviting them to contribute a plant from afar.
There’s no single right way to do this — some families prefer a quiet, solitary project, while others find comfort in a more communal planting experience.
Best Plants for a Memorial Garden
There’s no single definitive list of “best” memorial garden plants, since plant choice is often deeply personal — tied to a favorite color, a flower the person loved, or a plant that reflects their personality. That said, a few general categories are commonly considered.
Blooming and Symbolic Plants
Many people choose plants with a personal connection to the person being remembered, or ones commonly associated with particular qualities. A few examples sometimes mentioned in this context include rosebushes (often associated with love or beauty — see our garden rose varieties guide for types to choose from), lavender (often associated with calm or peace), and hollyhocks (sometimes associated with remembrance). For a closer look at flower meanings tied to death, mourning, and loss specifically, this guide to flowers that symbolize death, mourning, and loss goes into more detail. As with all flower symbolism, these associations can vary by source and culture, so they’re worth treating as general inspiration rather than fixed rules.
Trees and Shrubs
Trees and shrubs can add height, structure, and longevity to a memorial garden, and some people choose a specific variety connected to a season the person especially loved — flowering trees for spring, for instance (our flowering trees and shrubs planting guide covers several options and mature sizes), or a shrub with bright fall foliage. Before planting a tree, it’s generally worth researching its mature size and checking for nearby utility lines, pavement, or structures that could be affected as the roots and canopy grow.
Ground Covers
Low-maintenance ground covers, such as creeping flowering plants or low grasses, can help tie a design together and reduce the amount of ongoing upkeep a memorial garden needs, which may be helpful if you expect visits to be occasional rather than frequent.
What Is the “70/30 Rule” in Gardening?
This phrase doesn’t appear to have one single, widely documented, authoritative definition in general horticulture, and it isn’t specific to memorial gardens in particular. Some gardeners informally use a rough idea along these lines — for example, allocating roughly 70% of a planting to dependable, structural, or foundational plants, with the remaining 30% reserved for seasonal color, accents, or more experimental choices — but this appears to be an informal guideline used inconsistently rather than a fixed horticultural standard. If you’ve seen this term used with a specific meaning elsewhere, it’s worth treating that source’s definition as one interpretation among possibly several, rather than an established rule everyone follows.
Good Things to Add Besides Plants
Many memorial gardens include a few non-plant elements that add a personal, reflective quality to the space:
- Hardscaping, such as a simple stepping-stone path or a small paved area, which can guide the eye and improve access to the garden over time.
- A seating area, like a bench or a quiet corner with a chair, offering a place to sit and reflect.
- A dedication, such as an engraved stone, plaque, or a simple hand-painted sign with a name, date, or meaningful phrase.
- Reflective touches, such as wind chimes, a small water feature, or solar lighting for evening visits.
None of these are required — a memorial garden can be as simple as a single plant in a meaningful spot — but they’re commonly added by people looking to create a more complete space for remembrance.
Care and Maintenance Over Time
Like any garden, a memorial garden generally needs some ongoing attention to stay healthy and meaningful. Needs tend to shift with the seasons: spring often calls for feeding and encouraging new growth, summer for watering and watching for pests, fall for clearing fallen leaves and preparing for colder weather, and winter for protecting more delicate plants from harsh conditions. Periodic pruning and occasional weeding (often reduced with a layer of mulch or compost — see our mulch vs. rock for flower beds comparison if you’re deciding between the two) can help keep the space looking cared for.
Because a memorial garden can carry real emotional weight, some people find ongoing maintenance to be part of the comfort it provides — a regular, gentle way to stay connected. Others may prefer a lower-maintenance design from the start if they expect visits to be less frequent. Either approach is reasonable; it generally comes down to what feels sustainable and meaningful for you.
FAQ
What are the best plants to plant in a memorial garden? There’s no single definitive list — plant choice is often personal, tied to a favorite flower, color, or quality associated with the person. Roses, lavender, and flowering shrubs or trees are commonly chosen, but almost any plant with personal meaning can work.
What is the 70/30 rule in gardening? This doesn’t appear to have one fixed, widely documented definition. It’s sometimes used informally to describe a rough split between dependable structural plantings and seasonal accent plantings, but treat this as one possible informal interpretation rather than an established standard.
What are some good things to put in a memorial garden? Besides plants, commonly added elements include a dedication plaque or engraved stone, a seating area, a simple path, and reflective touches like wind chimes or solar lighting.
What makes a garden a memorial garden? Generally, it’s the intention behind the space rather than its size or layout — a memorial garden is any outdoor space, large or small, created specifically to honor and remember someone who has passed away.